A Whole New Set of Jokes

The day that we arrived at Glacier, we only went on a short, easy hike. A warm-up to the comings days' activities.

On the second day of our trip, we meant business. We hiked 7 miles in the morning, took a break in the afternoon while Keith's aunt and uncle retrieved his cousin from the Kalispell airport, and then hiked another 4 miles in the late afternoon/early evening. It's easy to lose all sense of time when you're (1) on vacation, and (2) in a place where the sun rises about 6 am and sets close to 10 pm.

So we set off mid-morning from McDonald Lodge on our first big hike. Our surroundings were so different from any park in the Midwest that I'd ever been; there were different types of trees and wildflowers. We were at a significantly higher elevation and surrounded by mountains.

But what really struck me was the sound of the bear bells as we hiked. Typically when one hikes, one attempts to be as quiet as possible so one can see and hear nearby wildlife. However, in Glacier there's a significant possibility that nearby wildlife may be a Grizzly bear.

For this reason, all tourists buy bear bells. They're like what you think of as Jingle Bells, but with a Velcro strap to attach them to a backpack or hiking stick, and they continuously jingle as you hike. In theory, the sound scares bears off. In reality, it seems like they're just a tourist gimmick.

Listening to the bear bells kind of gave me a "you're not in Kansas, anymore" feeling. A constant reminder that I could be devoured at any moment. Exciting and appalling all at the same time.

That evening, Keith's parents and aunt and uncle (who had all arrived a few days before us) were sharing some of the Grizzly country humor they'd picked up.

Uncle Jerry: How can you tell the difference between Black Bear scat and Grizzly scat? ..... Black Bear scat has berries and the bones of small animals. Grizzly scat has berries, small animal bones, and bear bells.

I laughed, and thought about how that joke wouldn't have made any sense to me at all the day before. Although really: scat is always amusing. I felt like I'd been initiated into a really cool club. That knows about bears. And whose members may be devoured at any moment. Now that's a cool, edgy club.